Thought
Spot the red flag
Nothing dramatic happened at this board meeting. That was the problem.
This week ToyBox played a game. A monthly board meeting: the finance report is two days late again, the treasurer says the bookkeeper "has it handled," nobody else has login access, and the vote is unanimous with no questions.
- 🚩 Late reports, again
- 🚩 One person holds the keys
- 🚩 No questions asked
The answer was all three. Late reports mean the board decides without the numbers. Twelve loyal years is not a control. And a unanimous vote with no questions isn't trust; it skips the board's duty of care.
This one means a lot to me. I'm a board treasurer, an interim COO and a former nonprofit COO, and I've seen this scenario more than once. "The bookkeeper has it handled" plus a board approving documents it has never seen is a host of internal control issues. It's something I consult on and advise against when I'm helping a client.
When I manage a client's finances, I make sure I'm never the only one with access, and every decision I make goes through leadership and the board first, as it should. I've also lived the worst version: in one organization, the person controlling the finances, the board reports and the bookkeeping was misappropriating funds. Working through that took a long time, and it taught me much of what I know about finance and restricted funds. I use it in my work today, and it's why I love to teach and inform people about this.
It's not that you don't trust people. It's that you put things in place so everything is done with fidelity, especially with public dollars.
Even when it isn't public money, keeping integrity strong still matters. The fix is small: two people with account access, a monthly bank reconciliation a board member reviews, and at least one finance question at every meeting.
Window 3, one year later
On LinkedIn this week I wrote about being called "the warden." That was as the first COO in my role. I was hired to bring structure to the organization, and as a result of the new policies and procedures, the tools and software and all of those things, "the warden" was the analogy that got used. A year after writing Window 3, I'd say it plainer: fragility in the nonprofit sector isn't a flaw. It's a funding choice.
How I built the ToyBox Brain
Harvard Business Review (Oct. 2026) says the people getting the most from AI build systems around their strengths. That's been my experience. What I had to fix first wasn't the tech. It was getting organized and deciding what goes where.
New at ToyBox
Also new from ToyBox this week: change management for public agencies, the four money buckets, and why a hard week at work calls for a circle, not a memo.
From the writing desk
Revisiting Late Bloom
Last August I published a short story called Late Bloom: Noa, a tired executive and single mom, a lavender bath, a garden, and a hummingbird that shows up right when she chooses herself.
Late Bloom came out of a hard stretch. Just over a year ago I had lost my job and was trying to get back to myself, and writing has always been where I go. I wrote and read stories as a kid.
Noa is fiction, but she loosely mirrors me and other women in my life going through our own late bloom. I'm in my mid-40s, a Xennial, and a lot of this is happening all around me. I first wanted it to be a book. It became a short story, and then my Five Windows series took over.
I tried hard to make it feel like fiction, but it's really a picture of life.
A year later I see what I couldn't then. Noa has what I've dreamed of, a successful executive career and financial security, and she still deals with the real stuff, like good guys gone bad.
What's next? I'm not sure yet. I haven't shared it much, so I want to see what it does as a short story. If you know a place that features short fiction, hit reply.
Taste
Pie at home, eggs in the sky
My fall favorite: apple pie
I cook my apples first, soft and smothered, like a turnover.
Blame the fast-food pies I grew up on: the Hostess pie I microwaved after school (burned my tongue every time), the old fried McDonald's pie, and, when I was pregnant with my son, a McDonald's apple pie crushed into a vanilla shake. Lattice on top, cooled filling so the crust stays crisp.
What was your favorite fast-food pie? Hit reply.
Ascend: 31 floors up
Five kisses, dedicated to the chefs on site.
Watching the video this morning, I thought: I could really use a steak and a nice cocktail from Ascend right now. The ambiance is great, it feels amazing, and the service just feels welcoming.
Four visits on camera, from the Drowning in Silence premiere celebration to a solo lunch with a lake view. My standing order: the Nitamago deviled eggs with bacon-pea jam and braised pork belly. And that purple swirl? Okinawan sweet potato, ube's purple cousin.
Last week's answers
Who called it
🚩 First to spot the red flag
No correct answers yet, so the crown carries over. The first correct answer gets named here next Monday.
💋 Guess the spot: Ascend
Nobody cracked it this week. A new teaser drops Thursday.
🍎 About the Red Apple
A little more dialogue came in about the old Jackson Red Apple and the one on Beacon Hill, and I think the way I said it, people misunderstood. I wasn't saying the Jackson store was there first. I experienced the Jackson one first, on my after-church stops with my mom. Now we default to the one on Beacon Hill for our fixes.
🥣 Split pea season
On TikTok, a couple of you showed up for split pea soup. I see you. Get the recipe →
Presence
Thankful, and caught up
This has been a good week to chill and be really thankful.
Especially for my family, who have been there through one of the most difficult transitions I've navigated: moving into full-time entrepreneurship. And for my son, for being such a bright, responsible and intuitive young man.
We took some time to get housework and maintenance done. It felt really good to catch up that way and get set for fall, when I love to do more cooking.
Coming Home, Friday 11/6
This year, Coming Home means we keep supporting women experiencing homelessness on the way to a home of their own. I know how things can be when you're dealing with housing insecurity. As I've learned over many years, it doesn't just go away overnight, even while you're transitioning, trailblazing and class busting. Get your tickets
One full breath
This week's sit, from Mindfulness in the Middle. Before every talk, I take one full breath.
Breathe in for 4. Hold for 4. Breathe out for 6.
Coming up
- Fri10/30Space Between auction closes Friday at noon. Bid
- Wed11/4Out the Box, issue 1. ToyBox's new monthly letter starts Wednesday the 4th. Subscribe
- Fri11/6Coming Home with The Sophia Way, Hilton Bellevue. An evening celebrating the journeys of women to a home of their own, and the community that walks with them. Get tickets
Off the clock
Horror movie season: the dump 🎃
Halloween is close, and I'm a horror film fanatic. Here's everything I watched this month, one line each.
- 🩸 Carrie (the series): Loved it. More, please.
- 🔪 Crystal Lake: Super good.
- ⛺ Friday the 13th (1980): Worth the rewatch.
- 🎃 Rob Zombie's Halloween: Disturbing. Loved it.
- 🛏️ A Nightmare on Elm Street 1 & 4: Classic Freddy.
- 🧛🏾 Vampires vs. the Bronx: Cute, surprisingly deep.
- 🦇 Vampire in Brooklyn: Underrated. Redo it.
- 🪓 Frailty: Old classic.
- 💍 Bride of Chucky: Funny, gory.
- 📖 Evil Dead (2013): Sending me back.
- 🔥 Evil Dead Burn: Over the top.
- 🎬 Scream 7: Pretty neat.
- 👻 Boo! A Madea Halloween: Funny. Growing on me.
- 🖤 Meet the Blacks 2: Katt Williams. Classic.
- 🧹 The Craft: Legacy: Nostalgic, good remake.
- 🎰 Army of the Dead: Zombies with a plot.
Billy, Stu and Neve, live
I got to see the Scream cast chatting at Emerald City Comic Con a couple of years ago.
Horror fact of the week: the actors who play Carrie in the new Carrie series and young Jason Voorhees in Crystal Lake both grew up in the Chucky world. Summer H. Howell (Carrie) was Alice in Curse of Chucky (2013) and Cult of Chucky (2017), and Callum Vinson (young Jason) played Henry in season 3 of the Chucky TV series. And Matthew Lillard, Stu from Scream, plays Principal Grayle in Carrie.
Honorable mention: the stick-figure zombie survival series on TikTok, a different place to ride out the apocalypse every episode. Many credit @stickocalypse_shorts.
Fave game: Dead by Daylight. Killer: Chucky or the Bride. Survivor: Dwight or Lara Croft.
What are you watching this October? Hit reply with your scariest pick.
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See you next Monday,
Katoya